north korea successfully launched a nuclear -- nope, never mind. >> here we go. i got one. you guys remember oscar pistorius, the olympic sprinter who ran on blades? >> amazing story. so uplifting -- >> absolutely. >> says here that -- nope, no, no, no. >> hey, this is interesting. you guys think you might have it bad? do you have it worse than 4,000 stranded on nightmare cruise? that is about us. >> that's us. yeah. >> that's enough. >> enough with the headlines. we want to designate a few more areas on the boat as toilets, okay? what do we got here? the superstar karaoke bar is now officially a toilet. okay? >> the blue iguana cantina is now a toilet. >> just in time. good. and the bonzi sushi restaurant, that's still a sushi restaurant so you want to get in there soon before it becomes a toilet. >>> all those headlines and a school bus-sized meteor hit russia. good time to be out at sea. >>> with the pope stepping down, there's a question of how he will manage those assets. "snl" once again has our answer. >> you tried to make sound financial decisions. what will you do